I only have 2 weeks left of my job and then it’s a full on build up to university. How crazy is that?!? This time last year, I was working as a face painter, feeling a little low and a little de-motivated for the gap year ahead and thinking that I had hardly anything to do with my life but I was too anxious to go out and find something to do. How times have changed: I really do feel like I have grown up so much in the past 10 months. Not because I have had this blog to upload to regularly but because I have allowed myself time to really calm down and find my feet again. I actually feel much more comfortable within myself and I love it.
Now, I am not saying that I am now some super human that can do anything without getting scared or frustrated or upset about it. I am still an overly emotional and on edge mess but I feel like I can control that side of me a lot better now. I don’t remember the last time I felt a panic attack starting and I have just allowed it to take charge of my body. I take my thoughts “outside of my body” and think about what I would say to someone starting to have a panic attack to make them stop and, at the moment, it works and that’s all I care about really. As long as I stay in control of them, I feel like they will never get control of me again.
When I start university in September, I am expecting nerves. But, I feel as though everybody will be nervous so we can all just get in our little anxious boat and keep telling each other to just hold on and we will be OK (or at least that’s what I hope.) I feel as though, if I am in the same situation and am feeling the same as everyone else, it will feel different to when I had a panic attack as I felt that nobody else felt the way I did. I keep trying to think of it like that to make myself feel less daunted by the fact I am moving out of my bedroom of 19+ years into a university hall of raving teenagers getting smashed on a Thursday or something crazy (that is crazy to me as it is currently Thursday and I am wearing a Miranda Tour T-shirt, leggings with avocados on and Santa socks while considering whether to watch PLL or get my HSM 3 movie collection DVD out.)
I am also getting prepared for my 56 Days of Summer. I am dramatically less prepared that I was planning on being but I think I have done enough to keep up. I am still working 4 days a week at school and then working for helpmeorganics after school and at the weekend. Which reminds me, if anyone would like to pop down to the Darnhall show this Sunday (9th of July) then you are more than welcome to! I like pop a link to our blog post which has all the information about the show and what else will be there HERE.
While I am on the subject of helpmeorganics, I would like to announce that we are going to be featured in The Really Good Box VERY soon! It isn’t going to be the usual room sprays that are always the ones that pop up in subscription boxes, which will be very refreshing. I will pop a link here to The Really Good Box’s website so you can have a sneak peak of the company and their boxes. We also have a competition at the moment to win our full summer range which is on both our Twitter and our Facebook, which also means you have two separate chances to win so you can also pop over to our social medias to get yourself a chance to win some organic, vegan and paraben free products.
Lastly, probably one of the best things that has happened since I started this blog: I have been shortlisted for the Teen Blogger Awards for not just one award but TWO. My “I Can’t Believe I’m An Adult” blog post has been nominated for the “Best Blog Post” and my blog has been nominated for the “Most Ascetically Pleasing Blog”. When I was told the news, I couldn’t stop smiling for the whole night. Honestly, I never even thought that I would be anywhere near good enough to even but nominated for the awards, let alone be shortlisted and have a chance to win. I am over the moon. If you would like to vote for the Teen Blogger Awards, I will leave the link HERE. There are so many wonderful blogs in not only the categories I have been nominated in but also others so it is certainly a lovely way to discover some little gems. It costs nothing to vote and all you would need is a valid email.
Well, this blog post has turned out a little longer than I expected. I felt like I have a lot going on at the moment so it is really refreshing to write it all down and it turned into something in the style of a blog post. I always envisaged this blog housing blog posts of this style so it’s nice to relax, sit at the computer with a bowl of ice cream with chopped up strawberries on top with PLL on the next tab along and write a little blog post about where I am in accordance to my gap year and how I am finding it.
I hope you have a wonderful rest of your day!